Gay & Lesbian Divorce/Domestic Partnerhip Mediation Divorce Expert
Since January 1, 2005, California same sex couples who are registered domestic partners have been granted virtually all of the same rights and advantages that traditional married couples enjoy. What this also means is that if the partnership does not work out—for whatever reason—the couple needs to dissolve their relationship legally.
Divorce Mediation is an alternative to litigation (where attorneys fight one another for what their clients want.) Mediation, on the other hand, is an informal meeting with a neutral mediator and the couple working together cooperatively, calmly and fairly with sensitive to LGBT relationship.
At The Divorce Help Clinic™ we will help you resolve your same sex couple cohabitation, domestic partnership, divorce or custody issues in a sane, sensible and fair way at a reasonable cost.
How the Process Works: Our LGBT mediation staff is specifically trained in Same Sex Couples issues and is sensitive to the nuances in these relationships.
A mediator will guide the same sex couple through a series of step-by-step confidential sessions to resolve issues that might block agreement. This process also applies to domestic partnerships. The process is quick and efficient.
In mediation, the private issues discussed in session as well as your personal and business finances are kept out of public records. When using attorneys to obtain a divorce, nothing is private. Any "Joe" can access your information at any time.
If you have minor children, a mediator will help you create a co-parenting plan (a.k.a. child custody and visitation schedule) that makes the children’s welfare the top priority.
Document Preparation in Mediation: Although our mediators cannot and do not represent you within the mediation (as they work as neutrals), they do hold legal degrees and are therefore able to draft and file all of the necessary documents to initiate and finalize your divorce, including your Marital Settlement Agreement.
Role of Attorney in Mediation: Consulting Attorneys in Mediation: While you do not need to retain an attorney, if you choose to mediate your divorce, it is HIGHLY recommended that you consult with an attorney. At the very least, once the Marital Settlement Agreement is completed (before you sign it), it is best to have an outside attorney review the Agreement from your own personal perspective and give you feedback as to the agreements made.
Privacy: What You Don't Know will Shock You!
Many people don't realize that at the end of a divorce (one using attorneys), everything that came out in the divorce becomes public record--financial statements, debts, accusations of cheating, molestation, addictions. Making matters worse, nothing is private. Anyone can read the sordid details. This is not the case when couples use mediation to divorce as you will read shortly.
While the lack of privacy may not seem like an issue now, down the road it could be. For example, anyone who has romantic interest in you
if there are issues with co-parenting and baseless calls are made to child protective services, your divorce file is surely to be a document that will be reviewed by CPS! Or your future mate may be interested to learn about whom he or she is dating and realize she can grab your divorce file to learn about your behavior with your previous mate. We all know that divorce is a stressful time and a time when you are not on your best behavior, so to keep your private life private - avoid litigation!
At the end of the divorce mediation process, the only document made public is your Marital Settlement Agreement. This document sets forth the final agreements made within mediation--how much support will be paid, co-parenting arrangements, visitation schedules, who gets the pet, and so on. Though still personal, it is minor compared to what is revealed at the conclusion of a litigated divorce. The courts guarantee confidentiality for those using mediation. The goal is to encourage people to agree on their own without clogging the courts with their fighting.
Popular Partial Mediation Services
Not all issues require weeks of mediation. Some things can be resolved in a matter of hours.
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Couples Considering Divorce: Working with couples to decide IF divorce is the best option. Sometimes all that's needed to save a marriage is mediating problem issues to find workable solutions.
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Custody Battle. Often times, making slight adjustments in your behavior during the divorce process is all it takes to get the court to divide custody time more evenly. Just because your situation may look helpless, doesn't mean it is.
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Single Parents: Teaching separated parents how to spend quality time with their children.
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Divorced Parents: Helping divorcing couples to establish a co-parenting plan that works for everyone involved.
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Engaged Couples: Don't let the first year of marriage be your worst. Money is the number one reason couples divorce. Learn how to avoid this by establishing solid financial practices. Also learn how to build a strong foundation and avoid the other pitfalls that lead to divorce. Come up with agreements to make your marriage strong from the start. (Also suggested for Newly Married Couples)
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Blended Families: Blended families have the highest rate of divorce. Mediating new roles, expectations and issues of conflict can help avoid commonly destructive forces between spouses and new family members.
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Post-Marital Adjustments in co-parenting plans after a divorce.
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Pre-Nuptial Agreements. With couples marrying later and multiple marriages, having a pre-nuptial agreement is a smart decision. And if handled poorly, can end a relationship
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Pet Visitation Schedules. Don't forget your precious pets during divorce. They don't have to end up with one "parent." Instead, setting up a formal agreement about shared visitation can be as detailed as some people make for their children. For people who love their pets, putting your pet's interest first will make a better life for everyone. More
- Marital Mediation. If you and your spouse can't resolve certain issues, mediation will help you find resolution before the problems get so deep-seeded that divorce becomes the only way to solve the issues.
COST: We have two programs for you to choose from:
1. The All-Inclusive, Flat Rate Fee ($3,500). This program is recommended for more complex cases. If you and your spouse have yet to come to an agreement on any issues and feel you will need a sufficient amount of help to negotiate your issues (3 or more 2-hour mediation sessions), then this fee structure is best for you. Under this arrangement, you will know your entire cost of your mediation up front, no matter if it takes you 3 sessions or 10 sessions. This includes preparation of all of your court documents as well as your final Marital Settlement Agreement. It DOES NOT include your court filing fees.
2. Hourly Rate ($300) Plus Document Preparation Fee ($2,500). This program is recommended for couples who have come to many agreements already on their own and need a session or two to ask questions regarding the agreements they made and the consistency with the local laws regarding the issues. Perhaps there is an issue or two to work out, but for the most part you and your spouse need help with arranging everything into proper order and getting all agreements made into a proper Marital Settlement Agreement. This arrangement will save you money only if you limit your sessions to two 2-hour sessions. Once you reach a third session, the hourly fee will exceed the flat fee rate. This program DOES NOT include your court filing fees.
Same Sex Laws
Cohabitation. A term applied to Couples who live together in a relationship similar to a marriage (i.e., physically and/or emotionally intimate), but who are not married.
Cohabitation Agreement. An agreement you draft with your partner to establish your rights and responsibilities regarding each other’s income and property during the period of cohabitation, as well as your household expenses.
Same-Sex or Gay Marriage. “Gay marriage” or “same-sex marriage” is a term for a legally and socially recognized marriage between a woman and a woman or a man and a man.
Defense of Marriage Act or DOMA. A US federal law signed by President Bill Clinton in 1996, which says no state needs to recognize a same-sex marriage, even if it is considered marriage in another state. And, that the Federal Government may not consider same sex partnerships as marriage for any purpose, regardless of any state law.
California Proposition 22 (a.k.a. California Defense of Marriage Act, a.k.a. the Knight Initiative). California’s ballot initiative preventing same-sex marriages, which defined marriage as, “a personal relation arising out of a civil contract between a man and a woman, to which the consent of the parties capable of making that contract is necessary.”
In re Marriage Cases. A May, 2008 California Supreme Court case holding “that the California legislative and initiative measures limiting marriage to opposite-sex Couples violate the state constitutional rights of same-sex couples and may not be used to preclude same-sex Couples from marrying.” In re Marriage Cases ruled California Proposition 22 unconstitutional, granting gay Couples the right to legally marry.
Proposition 8. In November, 2008 California State ballot proposition that overrode In re Marriage Cases, and restricted the definition of marriage to a union between a man and a woman. When Proposition 8 passed, it eliminated the right of same-sex Couples to marry. Language was added to the California state constitution which states, “Only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California.”
